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Shawna grew up with a secret that she couldn't share with anyone. She thought of it as her "inner demon" and it shaped her life. When she became an adult, it sent her on a quest to try to find her Real Home. In Paris, she fell in love with a fellow traveler who changed her life, for better or worse. Their relationship was full of discovery and of lessons learned.
How could she come to terms with her "inner demon"? Can we change our fate or karma? Does love really conquer all?
This book is based on a true story of an independent woman's search for her true self and the meaning of life, and how she found answers in unexpected places.
I meditated in my Paris apartment the day before leaving for London.
Hurricane John had picked me up and tossed me around high in the air, and then pounded me on the sand. Like my aunt’s tea cup, I broke into pieces and lay at the bottom of the ocean. I wished sharks would eat me, but none came. But there was a gentle manatee that floated by and pushed all of my pieces together with her nose. Slowly, I became whole again. I found a shield and an arrow lying on the ocean floor, and quickly picked them up. I climbed on top of the manatee, and she easily carried me to the surface. I walked out of the water with my treasures and lay in the warm sun letting it heal my wounds. I closed my eyes for a time.
When I opened them an eagle was hovering above me, staring at me. I realized its message of freedom and strength, and soaring to new heights. I would be happy with or without John. I really did not need him. I never did. A connection to the divine was at hand and I needed to prepare. Change would be coming, and I welcomed it with open arms.
London. Home again. I felt like I could breathe once more. My new life had begun and I waited for the stirrings of new growth to move me onward and upward. No more going backwards ever again, I swore to myself.
I moved in with Trina. We became friends when I worked in London. A successful lawyer with room to spare for a lost American gal. But not for long, I hoped.
Inspiration to Your Writing
It was predicted in 1995 by a female psychic reader in New Orleans, that I would write a book in about 10 years. I remembered that I laughed and told her that would never happen. I then got curious and asked if it would be a spiritual book. She said, “All books are spiritual.” I didn’t really believe that, but okay.
Ten years later, and I still wasn’t writing, and I started thinking she was nuts. But a couple of years after that, I’m reading a book called, “Mental Muscle” by James Mellon. Now, my husband and I were living on our three acre property in Ometepe, an island in Nicaragua for a few months. It’s beautiful with a waterfront view, and I am bored out of my mind. There is only so much walking, visiting, and biking you can do. I tried to do something meaningful, but didn’t speak the language well enough for that. One of the chapters in the book was about intentions, including a global intention. It could be anything that added purpose to your life. That was the chapter that inspired me to start writing a book. For the record, I’d already been doing writing exercises every morning thanks to “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. However, my global intention was to express myself through writing that I would share with the world.
So I started writing long hand like I always do. The story I worked on was all about a dream I’d had a year or so before. I had written it down, and because the dream showed up like a movie, it was easy for me to remember.
When we got back to the United States, I finished writing it, and then started typing it out. This was the book I was sure the psychic reader was talking about. But I felt I needed to take some writing seminars or classes to hone my practice. I heard about a seminar close by, and decided to go to it. It was held in a conference room of a hotel, and there were about fifty people there. The facilitator started the seminar by giving us a meditation. This would help us choose what book to work on. She told us not to be surprised if a different book showed up than the one we’d written, or had thought about writing.
Well during the meditation, John, a real person that I knew, showed up and gave me the book which was in a box. Now I had a history with John, and I always swore I would never write about that history. Suddenly it was given to me, as if I had to write it. I balked at the thought, but the facilitator said that whatever book showed up, would be the one our soul wanted us to write.
So I already had a typed up manuscript, but now I needed to write a whole different story! One that’s personal that I didn’t want to talk about. I told myself I would write it, but if I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t publish it. Somewhere along the way of writing this story, my soul seemed to have found a voice. Memories (I have a good memory recall) came flooding back in. I grumbled that this book would kill me, if I wrote it. It’s too painful! But somehow I managed to keep going. As I cried and cursed along the way, I finally finished it. And throughout it, I looked for answers as to why things happened the way they did. The epilogue explains this, even though I’m not particularly happy with what the medium told me. But I wrote it anyway.
I had a lot of dreams when I started writing this book. I also remembered dreams I had back then, and it felt like John was around me a lot. I couldn’t seem to get rid of his energy, but with the help of energy healers I finally did.
So that’s the story of how I started writing.
Least favorite thing about writing: There are days when I don’t feel like it, so I might just write something that’s interesting to me, or just fun stuff.
Most favorite thing about writing: I get more in touch with my “Higher Self” or guides who help me along the way. I ended up meditating a lot more, which is a good thing.
Thanks for hosting me CR Moss.
About the Author
Shawna C. Jones lives in the US, when she's not traveling the world. She lives with her husband, and "inner demon" quite peacefully now. She is continuing her mission of helping others, and encouraging young people to travel and follow their dreams.
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